Playing with a group of children

is not something that George has been able to do. Hence his list, earlier in the year, of "everybody who hates me". I have always had great sympathy for his situation. His inappropriate behaviour has isolated him from his peers because he's "not normal" and they don't know how to cope with him.

It scares them...

His inability to behave like them has partly been the cause of his frustration and suicidal thoughts. He has, in the past, even tried to bribe children so that they would be "his friend".

A few weeks ago, George informed me that he would be playing football after school. I was intrigued by this, because in Juniors he joined the after school football team and when I observed him playing he always seemed to be running around like a lunatic... chasing the ball and trying to be everywhere at once. His coach explained how George just didn't "get" the rules of football. A penalty was given to the opposing side, and when the coach asked who would like to take it, George immediately put his hand up....

The change I saw in him, when I arrived early to collect him from football practice recently was amazing. He kept his position instead of trying to chase the ball down, and seemed to be accepted by his team mates. The following week, I observed the same situation. He wasn't the "nutty professor" flailing his arms and legs as he ran - he seemed more controlled and focussed.

Last week, I received a letter informing me of another detention that George had managed to pick up. My initial reaction was one of disappointment. However, when I called the school to find out the details, I ended up grinning.

No.... I haven't gone insane..... the detention was imposed on a dozen or so children for playing in a "no go area". George was playing with a group of children. He was doing what normal children do..... this is yet another indication that he is moving in the right direction.

This week, I had another meeting with the SeNCo. Apart from the detention, there was really nothing to report, so I think I can honestly say that June has been a good month. George is lucky in that Mr W really likes him... he can see past all the bravado and he thinks George is a brilliant young man. As we were talking about event logs, his lips were twitching (which means he is trying not to laugh). I pushed him for an explanation:

Mr W takes George for one science lesson per week. George is allowed into the classroom before the other students, to allow him a couple of minutes to gather his thoughts and settle down. Mr W related the story:

"George rushed in, muttering "there's no way I'm getting into trouble for that!". He sat down and made a visible effort to calm himself down. I peeked round the corner of the doorway, to see a number of students in line. They had their school blazers on, but the breast pockets had been ripped down and were hanging loose. They had obviously thought that this was a good game. George had decided that this was not a good thing to do and had removed himself from the situation before he could be tempted to follow suit"

Six months ago, George would have allowed himself to become involved in this activity, in an effort to ingratiate himself into the group. He did something that ADHD children do not normally do.... he thought about the consequences....

These are very small steps, but each step is significant and reinforces our belief that The Dore Programme is working.

I often look back at previous posts, so that I can try and measure our progress. George hasn't had a rage for about four months now - he used to have at least two a month. George used to blame all of his problems on his ADHD. His answer to every thing was "I can't help it, I have ADHD". He hasn't used this excuse for months. He believes that he is getting better, and this self-belief is, again, something that ADHD children do not normally have.

I don't want anybody who reads this to think that The Dore Programme is an overnight miracle - it isn't. We have recently experienced a slight backward step inasmuch as George has started making some of the "noises" again. This evening he went to feed his rabbits, and screeched all the way there......

When I met up recently with another "Dore" Mum, I mentioned this. Her child has been on the programme for much longer than George and she explained that this is perfectly normal. I have it in my mind, now, that he will probably take two steps forward, followed by one step back.... then two steps forward and one step back.....

That's OK with me. I can understand the logic behind it, and am quite happy to persevere. George, also, is happy to persevere. He seems to instinctively know that these "silly little exercises" are helping him.

There's been some good news regarding The Dore Programme recently. They have one centre open, in Kenilworth, and are working their way through clients, in date order, and inviting them for assessment. I think that's going to be about three and a half hours for us, in the car, but I'm looking forward to getting a new appointment.

Look hard enough, and you'll be able to find some comments which "rubbish" the programme. You don't have to look very hard to find lots of articles about how good it is. Dore could have abandoned all of us, when the company when into administration. They had no legal obligation to try and continue to provide any kind of service. Not only have they worked hard to support us, they have started to provide a continuance of the programme... at no extra cost to us.

That deserves a thumbs up, in my mind.

To all the other Dore Parents, I wish you continued success and offer my thanks for the continued support you have so freely offered.